Tuesday, May 1, 2007

how to deal with autistic miseries!

asper miseries and depressions




in another list, someone said....
>> "Being an asperger adult is miserible"!!

and.............from someone else!

> "I think that the social aspect of my life is not
good
> for people, like of me, on the spectrum of
aspergers and autism."

I tried to give some Advice!
here it is, my letter of reply....... for you all, on
your list.
------------------------

and hello all!

hmmm....
i feel your pains. I wish i could write some good
words to chear up you two, but maybe my own asperness
keeps a good counseling answer from coming.
that is a "biggie"....your question.

i will have to give it a try, maybe, perhaps i will
hit or miss or even irratate a bit; but i will write
SOMETHING!

from 500 feet away, i do not see your problem as an
asper problem, so much as a problem of
"self-acceptance and self worth"! i see it under the
file "i am depressed and somewhat bitter
because of my own conception of myself versus what i
see is out there, in the world"!
---wheelchair people, lonely people, heart attack
people...actually this is common to all people who see
themselves as not being part of the action of life.
actualy, this depression can be a first stage on the
way to healing as one is now discovering that there is
a lack, somewhere, in the personal life...you are not
anymore "dumb and happy"!

i know a man from india. Bombay. actually he is an
urban man.
he is depressed and angry, he now lives in a small
city and has no likes for the 20th century.
same thing.......he does not Fit, he is Lonely, he
must feel that there is nothing that he has that is
valuable enough in him, to be able to use in life. he
grouches about the "small conservative city of
tallahassee...boring boring and dull"!
not Bombay...but hey...there are THREE universities
here...FIVE major libraries. the public library has 20
to 30 internet computers, and the open-use FSU
library, that anyone can use, has 300 computers!
museams...galleries...singles clubs...parks...
-----i could go on and on and on-----
only Boring people find life Boring!!

can you change yourselves?!
I once lived in a town of 600 people, my home town, a
few years ago.
a year after i left, for health reasons[air polution],
someone whom i told that i lived there, he asked
me..."were you not bored out of your mind?"! i
replied that i had unanswered letters on the shelf and
ten books that sat half read on the table, all of that
year... as i had not a moment free to do anything
about them. then i went into a 30 minute rant about
all of the things that i would do in a day, in my home
town!
walk about the pretty quiet streets, shady with trees.
meditate.
church.
Volunteer with the Food Giveaway program at this
church.
cafe coffee.
relatives.
hikes in the country.
computer.
music.
talk talk talk to the town people.
---let alone personal maintanence!
.....and i a single man with no car!!

A man once told me how boring it was to look out of
the train window for hours at a pine woods, in South
georgia where the pine woods is 200 miles across. i
told him that i could talk for HOURS about what was
about that woods.....the people who live in it, the
weather and climate, the bugs and animals, the
terpintine gatherers and their lives, the Culture of
trees...etc..etc...

so.
two suggestions follow.

ONE----
try to get out of yourselves to have some greater
purpose to your lives. whether it is a Spiritual life
or another person or some idealisms...Get that Compass
of your life away from you iron belt buckle, so that
it can point to a True North. then you can walk true
through the Woods of Life: otherwise you will wander
around in circles with your North being only your
belt buckle self...self-centered!

TWO----
try to see what GIFTS aspergers has given to you, and
then to use them in your life! maybe you are good at
mental imaging or of scetchings with a pencil, or of
some way of seeing the world, attentionally or
visually, where you see and hear things that no one
else can sense.
thus then you can share with others your UNIQUE
sensings. in your lament that you are not like all
other people, there lurks a self non-acceptance. you
can NOT be like anyone or all everyones!
no one can! thus try to capitalize on your talents!
like: with me, i can tell if a cookie is homemade or
stale, in about .00042 seconds, at the first bite. i
have a very good mental picture talant...of course few
people can take the time to hear me talk it all out,
in this harried age, but that is NOT my problem, it is
theirs...
too, i have a spiritual life and have been blessed
with Out of body/near death type .....visions of the
afterlife worlds, complete with talks with relatives,
a TWO WAY conversations...thus i KNOW that life is
everlasting![i have about ten of these accounts on
file, ask me if you want to read them, if you had not
already read them!
who else can "rerun" a whole inner image video, of the
streets of the town that they used to live in, like
me?!

"ah", you say..."why bother to DO that, if life is not
worth living"?!!

THERE!
there it is...the Real problem-question, of these two
people, and of Most who Ask this Question and who are
depressed and bitter!

what can ya do to make life worth living?!
that is what YOU have to do: find that answer to that
question! it will be different for each and all, the
Answer! to find something that everything else
revolves and centers around, like of a hole in a
record album. and, yes, for some it is becoming
"saved", and having a religious/Spiritual life. but
for others, it is of Other things.
i would say.....at the LEAST: find, valadate,
culture,
and grow....YOUR SOUL!
know that you have one. then know it, belive it, live
it!
...freestonew@y......]

there...i said something.....

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